I think i'm starting to slip again. Or maybe I've been slipping for some time. Being drawn closer to the imminent bosom of the dreamworlds that visit me every so often.
I've had.. periods in my life where I've felt almost more connected to the adventures of my dreams, perhaps it's an escape from reality. I was never good with reality to begin with, it's all a bit to rigid and explored.
Don't get me wrong there is excitement in real life if you have the energy and the means to look for it. To have a really fun adventure you need time and money. If you lack either you are in for a whole other type of adventure that might not be as pleasant.
It just happens every so often, much like the seasons change that I fall into a state where I'm just more aligned with my dreams. And I like it.
It's here in this state of mind that I don't feel restricted by ALL the normal things that I have not learned about life. It is here I can think freely. It is a mellow state similar to the one where I wrote Hexagonica - feeling like crap because of sleep deprivation and other circumstances.
It's just a very unique mindset in which I feel creative and really at home.
This seem to come with a certain detatchment, as I don't spend as much time interacting with people which in retrospect is a bit sad. But lifes race is long, I have plenty of time for episodes where the people are in focus.
For now the focus is in my head, divided between Hexagonica, Dynasthir and new ideas that have yet to fully manifest. I don't really have a place for new ideas but hey. Neither did Hexagonica or Dynasthir at first. They will find a place.
They always do.
Signed, Mireneye
onsdag 29 augusti 2012
tisdag 7 augusti 2012
About a girl
(Something funny to listen to for you while reading)
Dedicated to one rad girl.
Tonight you had me thinking hard, trying to remember. Had me pondering the times we had. But my memory, oh so selective has me lingering on the very essence of the moments and not so much the detail.
At Convection, my memory is like a mixture of emotion and experience. The highs for me was hiking to the rock, doing my routine at night and last and perhaps greatest meeting so many awesome and special people.
Among them, you.
And like the coming night, my memories fade into distant darkness but with one light that shines subtle but brighter.
We connected there and then.
I have no idea what we talked about, how it happened, or what looks or gestures we shared. But I know we shared a lot.
But it never dawned upon me, for I was most likely to afraid to even think the thought.
So let me quote a work of mine.
"This might seem crazy, but tis is usually such; That I've come to love you - so crazily crazily much"
This is not something that I realized tonight. You've been on my mind. And I know I told you but not sure you heard it right. But I've held in my mind that I don't want to cause any discomfort so I've kept myself at bay.
When you once said "kindred spirits" I was moved. You move me, and you move me more then my body wants to admit.
For it knows just how twisted things might get. And I'm sure you know this too.
I want to be straight with you and tell you. But I'm fumbling in the dark to find ways to express.
You are a clever and I'm sure you will figure things out and I have all faith in you. And know that whatever path you choose to go and if you want me to - then I will stay by you.
*Hugs*
Signed, Peter
onsdag 18 juli 2012
Summertime
First I want to thank you all for checking back here every so often to read my updates. Secondly I want to apologize that I haven't wrtten in a while, there's a very good explanation however.
When I journeyed to USA I amounted so many things I couldn't keep up with and typing the blog became a chore and now I find that I don't have just as much time, the fact is I don't really make time for it at this very moment with everything going on in my life.
In my absence from Miles I hope to find inspiration of things to post and talk about. And I have all faith in the world that it will be marvelous!
I will start posting and take up Miles again in a close future and start posting more frequently but for now I'm taking a summer vacation.
Thanks for sticking with me, love you all!
Signed, Mireneye
måndag 18 juni 2012
The end of my journey
Around the fourteenth of May I left my city in Sweden.
And now that my journey is approaching it's end after around five weeks. It's hard for me to put in words, all the feelings welling up inside of me and all the experiences I've had.
I have not been able to keep up with the blog at all. What I have here is a speck of my adventure. But I have some stories I'd will portray but it's unlikely I will record entire festivals or days as I have tried to do so far.
I have so many great memories, so many people who have become eternal to me.
People I have come to love and cherish.
This is for you!
And now that my journey is approaching it's end after around five weeks. It's hard for me to put in words, all the feelings welling up inside of me and all the experiences I've had.
I have not been able to keep up with the blog at all. What I have here is a speck of my adventure. But I have some stories I'd will portray but it's unlikely I will record entire festivals or days as I have tried to do so far.
I have so many great memories, so many people who have become eternal to me.
People I have come to love and cherish.
This is for you!
---
The breeze
The breeze
You are like the air I breathe, the inspiration for my soul
It is your essence from which my wind was summoned
Like the leaf I rustled your cape
You never left me on the ground
Never alone
Like that gentle morning breeze you have blown me
blown me away with amazement
Like the leaf I am
I let the wind take me far and even further I got
But not always towards the known
Now the seed you planted
Now the seed you planted
Has settled - and will grow
---
Signed, Mireneye
Signed, Mireneye
fredag 15 juni 2012
tisdag 12 juni 2012
The lost diary: Part one
Day one, 05-03-2012
I woke up, early in the morning around the same time as my friend Xidor, having promised him I would help him to load todays batch of QLTR onto a truck to be distibuted.
Waking up that day was about as hard as getting a rock to dance polka. That morning I felt horrible and I would rather have stayed under the confort of my sheath, but oh well, a promise is a promise and I'm happy I was able to dance polka after a few initial dodgy steps in the early morning hour.
We took the buss downtown to get the Europecar truck.
While downtown we stopped at Preem to get a quick snack. We ended up waiting 25 minutes while they were fixing the cash register. We were getting terribly late.
While waiting Xidor decided to get the truck, I stayed there, talking to the people behind the counter.
Xidor finally returned and we set off for the press where they print QLTR and many other papers. On location we were informed that the paper would not be avaliable until 02:00 sen PM. Such a huge drag!
We made our way back to culture house KF Kretsen to diliver the bad news.
At Kretsen I had a lengthy talk to Kari, I've never seen her so stressed out, I think I was able to
give at least a tiny bit of comfort, and if so I'm happy I could.
I accompanied Kari and the others to culture lunch. Thought I could snug it in before having to clean for the roleplay session of the night. The topic of the day was mostly concerning "Scharinska" and how it's always been the frontier of odd culture. In my honest opinion "Scharinska" needs to be closed down for a time and given a small makeover to make it more fresh. But I absolutely think Umeå should keep it. It just needs a bit of love.
After the pleasant but maybe a bit long winded culture lunch I went to the store to buy something for the nights roleplaying session. My mind, tabula rasa as it was at the time concerning what treats to bring to the table I was happy to find Angelinn at the store.
Angelinn, first time I met her was before going to Finland to purchase the arcade dance machine that now resides in my apartment. They both work and take care of Rent a wreck, Umeå.
My mind blank as it was, already struggling to find something tasty, so I figured I'd ask her about advice.
She reccomended getting nachos, fresh guacamole and baby carrots and cucumber. Having never actually tried that combination, hell I never even tried guacamole and I kind of don't get the idea with avocade but I thought why the hell not? She was happy I took her advice, saying people rarely do.
And again I'm DAMN happy I did. It was the freshest,tastiest thing since chocholate bacon chip cookies in 2008. Aside from the "freshest" part, this was defnietly "fresher".
When we exited the store more or less in unison I told her about my futre trip to the US and I showed her what I was going to do there (poi) and even got her to try some. I think she could learn it pretty damn well. There's definietly potential there.
You know, on a sidenote It's weird, last time I met Angelinn was also on QLTR paper dilivery day.
Curious.
When I got home Chi called me and cancelled because she had promised some friends that she was going to play Mahjong with them, ok, then Jew (another friend of mine) had to work so we ended up not playing any pnp roleplaying games that day. Oh well.
I decided to go to thursdag practice at hamnis instead
---
Day two. 06-03-2012
I don't remember how I woke up but I woke up with LOTS of energy so I decided to do some cleaning.
Later that day I played ITG at my place with Manny (another made up name for the blog). Lots of fun! I think I have a picture of it somewhere. I will dig it up and update the post later.
I kept playing until later that evening when Zion, a female friend of mine came by. I grabbed a quick shower and then refurbished the bed into a sofa-ish setup. We watched the movie "Homeward bound" and cuddled and hugged, it was super sweet.
We shared the guacamole and the nachos from yesterday and after the movie was done we talked and I followed her the majority of the way home in the refreshing but cold rain. When I came home I crashed in my sofa with a wide smile on my face.
---
Day three. 07-03-2012
Messaged Chi about lunch downtown, she had just started preparing bread, and V was just about to slice a piece of cheese.
We decided to meet downtown at Café station. After a brief dicussion I grabbed V and had a good big hamburger at Frasses while Chi prepared Mahjong at the cafe.
When we got back we played Mahjong with V's sister and a girl I can't for my life remember the name of.
Quite early Sirn joined us and we played for, what was it.. six hours? Got a really mushy mind.
When we were done we all went to Megazone and had a bite. Planning our next step.
We also played some games at Megazone, I played some flipper with Sirn and then I tried the terminator game for the first time with Chi not too shabby I have to say! But she did own my ass, score wise, revenge my dear! It will rain down upon you!
We then decided to watch a movie at my place so we went by car to buy and collect some stuff, resulting in this over the top cool mix:
The cacti was especially tasty!
And a bonus pic of me preparing the quacamole:
We watched the movie Chronicle, don't ask, don't even read anythig about it and do NOT watch the trailer, it will ruin the entire movie! it's a good movie! Entertaining and different. That's all you have to know. Trust me. The ending is a bit cliché but meh, the ride is what's important.
After that we watched an episode of the anime "Eden of the east".
This reminded me so much of when I was young and watched anime with friends in Överklinten, sooo nostalgic and soo happy!
---
Day four. 08-03-2012
We finally got to start making roleplaying characters Kapow!
---
NOW. 13-05-2012
Sorry that this post was so long overdue. There was to much awesomeness happening at the same time but here it is finally, reporting from the US. These days meant the world to me. I love you all!
Mireneye over and out!
Signed, Mireneye
I woke up, early in the morning around the same time as my friend Xidor, having promised him I would help him to load todays batch of QLTR onto a truck to be distibuted.
Waking up that day was about as hard as getting a rock to dance polka. That morning I felt horrible and I would rather have stayed under the confort of my sheath, but oh well, a promise is a promise and I'm happy I was able to dance polka after a few initial dodgy steps in the early morning hour.
We took the buss downtown to get the Europecar truck.
While downtown we stopped at Preem to get a quick snack. We ended up waiting 25 minutes while they were fixing the cash register. We were getting terribly late.
While waiting Xidor decided to get the truck, I stayed there, talking to the people behind the counter.
Xidor finally returned and we set off for the press where they print QLTR and many other papers. On location we were informed that the paper would not be avaliable until 02:00 sen PM. Such a huge drag!
We made our way back to culture house KF Kretsen to diliver the bad news.
At Kretsen I had a lengthy talk to Kari, I've never seen her so stressed out, I think I was able to
give at least a tiny bit of comfort, and if so I'm happy I could.
I accompanied Kari and the others to culture lunch. Thought I could snug it in before having to clean for the roleplay session of the night. The topic of the day was mostly concerning "Scharinska" and how it's always been the frontier of odd culture. In my honest opinion "Scharinska" needs to be closed down for a time and given a small makeover to make it more fresh. But I absolutely think Umeå should keep it. It just needs a bit of love.
After the pleasant but maybe a bit long winded culture lunch I went to the store to buy something for the nights roleplaying session. My mind, tabula rasa as it was at the time concerning what treats to bring to the table I was happy to find Angelinn at the store.
Angelinn, first time I met her was before going to Finland to purchase the arcade dance machine that now resides in my apartment. They both work and take care of Rent a wreck, Umeå.
My mind blank as it was, already struggling to find something tasty, so I figured I'd ask her about advice.
She reccomended getting nachos, fresh guacamole and baby carrots and cucumber. Having never actually tried that combination, hell I never even tried guacamole and I kind of don't get the idea with avocade but I thought why the hell not? She was happy I took her advice, saying people rarely do.
And again I'm DAMN happy I did. It was the freshest,tastiest thing since chocholate bacon chip cookies in 2008. Aside from the "freshest" part, this was defnietly "fresher".
When we exited the store more or less in unison I told her about my futre trip to the US and I showed her what I was going to do there (poi) and even got her to try some. I think she could learn it pretty damn well. There's definietly potential there.
You know, on a sidenote It's weird, last time I met Angelinn was also on QLTR paper dilivery day.
Curious.
When I got home Chi called me and cancelled because she had promised some friends that she was going to play Mahjong with them, ok, then Jew (another friend of mine) had to work so we ended up not playing any pnp roleplaying games that day. Oh well.
I decided to go to thursdag practice at hamnis instead
---
Day two. 06-03-2012
I don't remember how I woke up but I woke up with LOTS of energy so I decided to do some cleaning.
Later that day I played ITG at my place with Manny (another made up name for the blog). Lots of fun! I think I have a picture of it somewhere. I will dig it up and update the post later.
I kept playing until later that evening when Zion, a female friend of mine came by. I grabbed a quick shower and then refurbished the bed into a sofa-ish setup. We watched the movie "Homeward bound" and cuddled and hugged, it was super sweet.
We shared the guacamole and the nachos from yesterday and after the movie was done we talked and I followed her the majority of the way home in the refreshing but cold rain. When I came home I crashed in my sofa with a wide smile on my face.
---
Day three. 07-03-2012
Messaged Chi about lunch downtown, she had just started preparing bread, and V was just about to slice a piece of cheese.
We decided to meet downtown at Café station. After a brief dicussion I grabbed V and had a good big hamburger at Frasses while Chi prepared Mahjong at the cafe.
When we got back we played Mahjong with V's sister and a girl I can't for my life remember the name of.
Quite early Sirn joined us and we played for, what was it.. six hours? Got a really mushy mind.
When we were done we all went to Megazone and had a bite. Planning our next step.
We also played some games at Megazone, I played some flipper with Sirn and then I tried the terminator game for the first time with Chi not too shabby I have to say! But she did own my ass, score wise, revenge my dear! It will rain down upon you!
We then decided to watch a movie at my place so we went by car to buy and collect some stuff, resulting in this over the top cool mix:
And a bonus pic of me preparing the quacamole:
We watched the movie Chronicle, don't ask, don't even read anythig about it and do NOT watch the trailer, it will ruin the entire movie! it's a good movie! Entertaining and different. That's all you have to know. Trust me. The ending is a bit cliché but meh, the ride is what's important.
After that we watched an episode of the anime "Eden of the east".
This reminded me so much of when I was young and watched anime with friends in Överklinten, sooo nostalgic and soo happy!
---
Day four. 08-03-2012
We finally got to start making roleplaying characters Kapow!
---
NOW. 13-05-2012
Sorry that this post was so long overdue. There was to much awesomeness happening at the same time but here it is finally, reporting from the US. These days meant the world to me. I love you all!
Mireneye over and out!
Signed, Mireneye
måndag 11 juni 2012
A weekend in revelation
I'm not sure how to tell this story, so I might just as well start somewhere.
There are so many different things happening to me at the same time now. Trying to speak about it feels overwhelming and difficult.
I wish I could just shoot the feeling right at you through the screen. Just for a short while, so you know what I'm feeling. But I will try to do my best to avoid shooting and keep it to words as best as I can. No promise it will be without any bullets, just saying.
There is a certain ambivalence to my feelings that I'm pretty certain I can explain.
On one hand I'm incredibly inspired, hyped, energetic and I have learned so many new things. Started learning dragon staff, learned some yoga practices, found a nice concept with a contact ball that I can play with. Began learning the "steve" with staff, basic toroids with poi and basic quarter arms motions. Last but not least, basic puppyhammer. And these are only the things that "feel" most significant to me. There are MANY other things floating around.
On the other hand I miss home in the sense that I'm starting to miss my friends at home, I miss my cat. I also miss mom and dad and I miss inspiring people to new heights. I'm also trying to deal with a bit of an emotional situation. The short rundown is this, I'm in an arrangement of sorts, but I'm actually starting to feel that it is holding me down and I strongly dislike that feeling. Especially right now when my mind is kind of divided. I feel sense of loyalty to my arrangement but my mind is still wandering off in other directions. It's not something I can avoid, it's just there. And I can't act freely upon it.
On a sidenote. My adventure was looking quite grim a few days ago with too little money to complete either of my bigger projects. And suddenly I got an offer to join the festival Convection. I ended up with a free ticket and a free ride. I have no idea why these wonderful people are so wonderful to me but I feel wonderful and I want to really do wonderful things back, but I somehow come up short in knowing how. I just trust in my own positive self for now and I think it will return by itself in time.
And you know what else? without even thinking about it specifically I ended up getting lots of footage for a new video. How can THAT many things just fall in place before my feet? It's not fate or chance. Call me a freaking hippie for saying this but I might be humble but damn, we are powerful beyond reason!
I have an entire post that details my Convection experience, with pictures. Just waiting to get them while polishing my story. I'm slowly catching up with my blog. I have a bunch of posts in the making atm that cover a lot of my adventure.
But that is kind of where I'm now, trying to decide what to do emotionally so I can think more clearly.
Signed, Mireneye
There are so many different things happening to me at the same time now. Trying to speak about it feels overwhelming and difficult.
I wish I could just shoot the feeling right at you through the screen. Just for a short while, so you know what I'm feeling. But I will try to do my best to avoid shooting and keep it to words as best as I can. No promise it will be without any bullets, just saying.
There is a certain ambivalence to my feelings that I'm pretty certain I can explain.
On one hand I'm incredibly inspired, hyped, energetic and I have learned so many new things. Started learning dragon staff, learned some yoga practices, found a nice concept with a contact ball that I can play with. Began learning the "steve" with staff, basic toroids with poi and basic quarter arms motions. Last but not least, basic puppyhammer. And these are only the things that "feel" most significant to me. There are MANY other things floating around.
On the other hand I miss home in the sense that I'm starting to miss my friends at home, I miss my cat. I also miss mom and dad and I miss inspiring people to new heights. I'm also trying to deal with a bit of an emotional situation. The short rundown is this, I'm in an arrangement of sorts, but I'm actually starting to feel that it is holding me down and I strongly dislike that feeling. Especially right now when my mind is kind of divided. I feel sense of loyalty to my arrangement but my mind is still wandering off in other directions. It's not something I can avoid, it's just there. And I can't act freely upon it.
On a sidenote. My adventure was looking quite grim a few days ago with too little money to complete either of my bigger projects. And suddenly I got an offer to join the festival Convection. I ended up with a free ticket and a free ride. I have no idea why these wonderful people are so wonderful to me but I feel wonderful and I want to really do wonderful things back, but I somehow come up short in knowing how. I just trust in my own positive self for now and I think it will return by itself in time.
And you know what else? without even thinking about it specifically I ended up getting lots of footage for a new video. How can THAT many things just fall in place before my feet? It's not fate or chance. Call me a freaking hippie for saying this but I might be humble but damn, we are powerful beyond reason!
I have an entire post that details my Convection experience, with pictures. Just waiting to get them while polishing my story. I'm slowly catching up with my blog. I have a bunch of posts in the making atm that cover a lot of my adventure.
But that is kind of where I'm now, trying to decide what to do emotionally so I can think more clearly.
Signed, Mireneye
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